What i wanted to said...

You made me felt safety...
whenever i look at you
You made me felt hypnotized...
with your beautiful eyes
You made me felt secured...
because you're a comfort zone
You made me felt hopeful...
that emotional connection is possible
You made me felt connected...
it's like we've known each other since forever
You made me felt suprized...
it's impossiblly rare to share so much in common
You made me felt relaxed...
i can go on talking with you
You made me felt calmness...
the world stops when i'm with you
You made me felt greedy...
i can never get enough of you
You made me felt flabbergasted...
that falling for someone is so easy
You made me felt conflicted...
i've been trying and failling to not fall for you

You make me feel love...
i'm happy that we are friends because i think i love you

Sickness Became Me

Been down since this Monday. Damn! I should take better care of myself. Eat healthier foods, go exercise and follow a more structured sleeping rountine. But of course, I did not. So now I'm still suffering (Seriously! SUFFFEEEERRINNG!) from crazy fever and depresive Tonsilitis.

I confirmed the fact that I'm super moody, cranky and magnificently un-productive when I'm sick. I've been laying on bed whenever I got the chance too since Monday. Lost some weight too. Swallowing anything has been like shoving stones and pebbles down my throat. Excruciatingly painful to bear, effingly annoying to wait for this to stop. (War Cry to my throat: You will not get me! Hell ya I'm gonna drink chilled yogurt drinks and stop eating solid foods!)

Nothing much I could do, or rather I wanted to do these past few days. Highlight of my days (well, at least for these few days...) is reading 'Map of the Invisible World' by Tash Aw. Oh! I thank him for his smooth story telling. Really soothened my pain.

I don't like it when people start bombarding me with calls EVERYTIME I'm sick! Especially those who called and ignored the fact that I'm literally speechless and continued with their noise pollution! Heck! I can't even stand lullaby being played at low volume! Do you really think I was listening to your stupid emo-babbling about breaking up with your boyfriend?

So please put down your end of the phone nicely and switch to texting me when I'm telling you that I'm sick. Don't be a bitch because I'm gonna be wasting your phone credit by putting my phone somewhere (far)away from my hearing...

Dear God! Please heal me... I'm withering into non-existence and I'm sad that I can't work (and play). Thank You for Your kind and always generous TLC. Amen.

i rather...

To A, K, WS, J, J, FS, and LP

i rather let you hate me,
than keeping the brutal truth from you.
i rather let you learn from your mistake,
than constantly correcting you.
i rather stay by your side,
than going away from you.
i rather talk to you in person,
than typing this and thinking about you.
i rather hug and kiss you,
than looking at the picture of you.
i rather wait for you to find out,
than telling you i have always love you.
i rather be sad and lonely without you,
than spending my time with anyone but you.

i hope you know all this, but it's impossible...
you don't know me, and you never will...

When are you coming???

I need time...
I need space...
I need energy...
I need passion...
I need bravery...
I need certainty...
I need my soul...
I need my time...
I need my love...

When are you coming???

Bummed...

There's this author named Neil Gaiman,
Whose stories are enjoyed by this man;
This man got himself almost all his books,
He swore to get them all, by hooks or by crooks;
"Smokes and Mirrors" was picked up one day,
This man was planning to read it in a day;
But then this man suddenly realised,
That the stories inside were full of suprises;
A hidden story as undelivered wedding gift,
A chopped arm as Mr Fox's death gift;
A stack of tarots about vampires,
Another stack of tarots owned by a sorceress;
There are many more suprises in store,
Which scare this man's friends even more;
Right now this man is feeling bummed,
Because he is not feeling calm;
This man wonders when he will,
Get his wild imagination to be still;
A warnng for all you scaredy cats out there,
Before you read Neil Gaiman you should put your imagination in "Neverwhere".

Poker Face

I won't tell you that I love youKiss or hug youCause I'm bluffin' with my muffinI'm not lying I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunningJust like a chick in the casinoTake your bank before I pay you outI promise this, promise thisCheck this hand cause I'm marvelous